My Crazy Wife

[tarcone]

decides to let my daughters invite friends over to spend the night. My daughters are 5 and 7. Im hiding in the basement. Its really loud up there.
very scary.

[Kobeck]

good move.


you did bring beer and a night light right?

[Hell Atlantic]

i'm gonna be a little apprehensive when (if) i have a daughter and she has her teen friends over for a slumber party. what happens if one of them comes on to me and i refuse, then they get all pissy and then go to the authorities saying *i* tried to fornicate with them? i'm gonna make sure my wife is always present at these things. and if we ever have a babysitter (who is a teen girl from the neighborhood) i'm gonna have my wife take her home.

[sovstar]

[tarcone]

Kids arent that good of liars. At least most kids. I wouldnt worry too much about it. Or get a girl that can drive.

[JesterBlaze]

what happens if one of them comes on to me and i refuse, then they get all pissy and then go to the authorities saying *i* tried to fornicate with them?

That's why I never look a gift horse in the mouth. I'd rather take a free horse with rotten gums than be blamed for causing said rot.

"If the donuts are there... glaze 'em!" and equally valuable: "Other than a mother protecting her young there's nothing more dangerous than a girl going through dick withdrawal."

Or get a girl that can drive.

Are they found in the land of QBs that can run and pass?

Disclaimer: These are "2 second drunk jokes" and not to be taken seriously. This thread actually made me think if I had a parent like Tarcone I might not be so fucked up. I had my first "sleepover" at age 21 in my own apartment and the "taste of blood finally" caused me to semi-perpetuate the situation for over a decade now at the expense of other things. Long live the parents who understand that they can only guide, and not control, their children!!! Viva la Tarcone!

[Suicane]

References 1 and 1a as to why I am not the creepiest guy in the league.
The defense rest your honor.

[Hell Atlantic]

which one was 1 and which one was 1a?

[Argot]

This is a disturbing thread :

[Suicane]

Whats going on in here? Hmmm?

[tarcone]

The payoff is tonight. She took our kids to her moms to spend the night. A bachelor night if you will. Woo hoo

[Matt]

so you're alone by yourself, or just the 2 of you?
either way, you're golden

[tarcone]

alone by myself

[Suicane]

Which pickup line won?

[dberner30]

decides to let my daughters invite friends over to spend the night. My daughters are 5 and 7. Im hiding in the basement. Its really loud up there.
very scary.

wait unitl birthday party sleep over and you have 8 of those crazy ass fools in the house...nowhere to hide...

and i 2nd the babysitter that drives shit...thats the only way to go...