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The Fans Want To Know - 2012 Preview-esque Edition

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  • The Fans Want To Know - 2012 Preview-esque Edition

    Lets get my version of a season preview going, The Fans Want To Know version! For those who may not remember, The Fans Want To Know was my original feature a couple years back. It is just what it sounds like, questions from the fans that I get while traveling around the country. Being the IFL expert that I am, they know I usually have the answers. Here it is mi amigos.


    Question 1: This time of the year I always get a ton of questions about the new guys on teams, no matter if it's rookies, free agents, or guys from trades. This first question was from a great Montreal fan. He had on a beret, was smoking a long thin cig, and had this really funny accent. Anyways, his question was of course about DE Marshall Brummitt, acquired in that huge trade that sent WR Abriktsen packing. He wanted to know if he will help make the impact they are hoping.

    Answer: I told this little guy that Brummitt is going to be great for the Firebirds. With Stone and Farley along that defensive front with him, offenses won't know who to double up the blocking on. Look for Brummitt, to get over 10 sacks this year. If he doesn't then expect one of the other two guys to have them because Brummitt pulled away the offensive linemen for them.


    Question 2: Speaking of WR Ken Abriktsen, I spent some time checking out Tulsa this preseason. At one of the games I had this girl come up, cute little thing until I found out it was actually a man. I am not sure what is going on in Tulsa, but for some reason I attract those people towards me. So this guy asked me about Abriktsen and if he will live up to the hype the team has built around him?

    Answer: I told him, after I answer this question get the hell away from me. Then I answered. I said Ken is the final piece of the puzzle, and he came at the perfect time. This offense has finally been built from the ground up, with some leadership and a plan. Everyone is ready to start making an impact. Third year QB Sanford, second year RB "DH" Singleton, a good mix of young but experience guys and veterans on the o-line. Abriktsen was the missing piece. He will get a lot of double teams, but I am positive he gets over 1,000 yards for the first time in his career without breaking a sweat.


    Question 3: I always shoot out to the great Pacific coast, and those Heroes fans are prety good at showing me a good time when I am in town. After spending the night with this hot little chica, I was in the uncomfortable position of having breakfast with her mom and pops the next morning. Her pops was a huge Heroes fan though, and he wanted to know about the only draft pick they had, LT Jay Alcott.

    Answer: While his daughter used her foot to play with my package under the table, I told him how the young tackle was a good fit for the team. Trust me when I last year's first round pick, RB Chapman, was very happy. I think he will benefit more then anyone, and expect his average to be over 4.0 this year. As for the whole team though, it is a hard call which way they go this year, up or down the standings.


    Question 4: I was up in a Kroger grocery store one night in Ohio, and you know where this is going. They love them some Cleveland Clawz in that part of the country. So I was getting some crappy deli food and the guy behind the counter recognized me when I reached for the bag of goodies. It's all about the hand. So of course the next thing out of his mouth is "Oh man! Corey Perkins gonna win an Imperial Bowl for us?"

    Answer: You have a better chance of losing 100 of your 400 LBS. this year I told him. In the future there is always that chance, but don't expect the kid to light up the league. The kid has no experience, he won't be ready to be a serious threat until 2013. Expect some good games from him this year, flashes of things to come.

    -------------------
    Now it's time to move onto some general questions, in that preview mode we are in here.


    Question 5: This is a always the most asked question right now, no matter where the flea bag motel I am in is located. Who is winning the Imperial Bowl this year?

    Answer: Your momma! After I wake back up, I tell them that right now I would have to go with the defending champs. Lawrence didn't make many major moves this offseason, but that is a good thing isn't it? Why change what works? Pretty good rotation on the defensive line now with Hertz in the mix by the way.


    Question 6: So who wins the AC and plays them then?

    Answer: Your sister! Crap, I am on my back again aren't I? Ok, so I say the AC winner will be the Wichita Outlaws. Not a flashy team so it may catch you off guard some. They knocked on the door last year though, and I like some of the rookies they threw into a veteran led team.


    Question 7: Who wins the _______ division?

    Answer: Your.....uhm, favorite team. See, I learn sometimes. Ok here are my division winners; Wichita, Murfreesboro, Norfolk, and Portland in the AC. I know, not too far out on a limb there am I? In the NC I have Madison, Texas, Lawrence, and Reno. You want wild card teams probably too huh? How about Newark, Little Rock, Houston, and California.


    Question 8: Who is your surprise team?

    Answer: I think I should have listed this question before the last one, but my answer would be the Mules getting over the hump as well as California, and Houston boucing back from a down year last season.

    That is all for now my friends.
    Adios,
    Pinky

  • #2
    GREAT, humorous write-up!!

    You have much more faith in the Phantoms this season than I and I thank you for it.
    <a href="http://glb2.warriorgeneral.com/game/signup.pl?ref=10223"><img src="http://goallineblitz.com/images/game/design/glb_badge-180x60.gif" /></a>
    IFL Champions: 2011, 2013, 2022, 2023.

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    • #3
      excellent, Heroes got some love in this article.

      i really don't know what kind of team i have. the fact that i traded CB Duane Edwards (who wasn't out for the year), should let you know whether i felt we could compete this year or not. however, preseason really changed my mind regarding what this team is capable of. i'm still preparing for a losing season - Lord knows we need a good high pick to land a nice stud player in the draft - but if we do win the wild card i wouldn't be completely shocked.

      however, we just don't have the secondary to compete. and Ruben Sante is just too shaky to be a dependable franchise QB. he's just keeping the seat warm for the next guy.


      Claire, That's Disgusting - A Heroes Blog

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      • #4
        sweet write up my friend. This is fantastic
        NEWARK BULLDOGS WALL OF HONOR
        DE JUSTIN JONES
        LB DOMINGO PERSAUD
        TE THOMAS MACOMBER
        LT IRWIN KAO
        WR ANDREW ROBEY
        SS GREGORY BOYD
        RB ALAN CRESPO
        G MALCOLM "BIG KAT" SINGLETON
        WR WALTER WALKER
        G AMOS BAILEY
        QB DWIGHT "KING" BURGER
        RB GARY "THE SITUATION" JAMISON
        WR JOSE HOOVER
        K BUTCH SCHULZ
        LB MACK EDWARDS
        DE STEPHEN BRIGHAM
        WR JESSE LUCAS
        C NORMAN ENRIGHT
        SS JUNIOR EL NIN0



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        • #5
          Loved it. Great write up about Albriksten. He made you look like a genius in his 1st game as a TigerHawk.
          IFL Champions-- 2016
          NC Champions-- 2015, 2016
          NC South Division Champions-- XI 2013-2023
          IFL EoY-- 2013, 2016


          Tigerhawk Hall of Fame:
          LT Tony Esqueda, MLB Eric Jean, RDE Ted Lofton, CB Oliver McKenzie, RB Ken "DH" Singleton, WR Ken "Brick" Albriktsen, RT Brock Heath, QB Matt Sanford

          Comment


          • #6
            Originally posted by tarcone View Post
            Loved it. Great write up about Albriksten. He made you look like a genius in his 1st game as a TigerHawk.
            That's funny, I don't see anything about the Brik meaning Tulsa keeps on losing.
            My banner is bigger and prettier and cooler then yours. I choose not to show it so your feelings do not get hurt.

            Comment


            • #7
              Originally posted by Cringer View Post
              That's funny, I don't see anything about the Brik meaning Tulsa keeps on losing.
              Brick cant play defense in this game. Otherwise, Tulsa would toss 16 shutouts. I cant help that I am limited by the game.
              IFL Champions-- 2016
              NC Champions-- 2015, 2016
              NC South Division Champions-- XI 2013-2023
              IFL EoY-- 2013, 2016


              Tigerhawk Hall of Fame:
              LT Tony Esqueda, MLB Eric Jean, RDE Ted Lofton, CB Oliver McKenzie, RB Ken "DH" Singleton, WR Ken "Brick" Albriktsen, RT Brock Heath, QB Matt Sanford

              Comment


              • #8
                Originally posted by tarcone View Post
                Brick cant play defense in this game. Otherwise, Tulsa would toss 16 shutouts. I cant help that I am limited by the game.
                He won this game for you, I will ease up some I guess. As our game gets closer I will slowly start to turn him into the greatest WR of all time. Call me Lou Holtz.
                My banner is bigger and prettier and cooler then yours. I choose not to show it so your feelings do not get hurt.

                Comment


                • #9
                  I am officially drinking the koolaid. I love me some Pinky!!

                  I meant the writer. Wow that sounded wrong.

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Originally posted by Pirates View Post
                    I am officially drinking the koolaid. I love me some Pinky!!

                    I meant the writer. Wow that sounded wrong.
                    Wow, that gave me a good laugh.

                    So you like your woman to do THAT to you eh?
                    My banner is bigger and prettier and cooler then yours. I choose not to show it so your feelings do not get hurt.

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Originally posted by Cringer View Post
                      Wow, that gave me a good laugh.

                      So you like your woman to do THAT to you eh?
                      Wow, I have no idea on how to answer.

                      Oh, ya. I am married. Enough said.

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